I could do the typical girlfriend thing and make Sean a heartfelt card for Valentine's Day, OR I could do the bad ass nerdy girlfriend thing and write a blog post about him and make it so the whole world can see how much I care about him. So, yes, obviously I'll do the latter.
Sean and I met way back during first semester, at a party where I was still heartbroken over an ex. And when I am feeling heartbroken, I wear my Heartbreaker bra, some kind of sequined top, and scrounge around for alcohol on a Saturday night. So when I met Sean, needless to say, I was not in the right frame of mind. Neither was he. We met at a frat party, and slowly trickled our way to the campus McDonald's (classy), where we feasted upon fries. We sat on the picnic bench outside and talked about the Pixies, 80's music, that drunk Asian chick who made out with a telephone pole, and our friends. By the end of the night, he tried to stick his tongue down my throat, to which I responded with a "NONONONONONONONONO" and a dash for my residence hall.
The night we met certainly wasn't that romantic, but everything else from that moment on was. We talked constantly, hung out CONSTANTLY, had real talk heart-to-hearts, but didn't want to admit we were dating. Correction: I didn't want to admit we were dating (See above: ex boyfriend). Here's the kicker and the really shocking/ enduring part: Sean waited. He waited for me to get over my douchebag ex. He understood that I didn't want to rush into anything. He never pressured me, never complained. He got me a birthday present, and a card that I keep on my nightstand at home, and we weren't even dating. Eventually, the dreaded Define The Relationship Talk surfaced it's ugly face from the Ocean of Ambiguity (which, also, took place at a party. God dammit. We are classy) and we decided, screw it, let's try this dating thing already. So we decided to become a couple. And it's probably one of the best decisions I've ever made.
He's really great. It's strange being with someone who actually listens to and knows every little thing about you. With Sean everything is different. He's with me on my good days and my bad days. He takes pride in my accomplishments, like getting into Phi Sig. He sends me goodnight texts, even though we just saw each other minutes before we went to bed. He watches stupid Youtube videos with me, and we quote them together. He gets me Doctor Who stuff, even though he has no idea what the fuck he's buying or why I'm so excited when I receive it. He lets me see the video games he's designing. He brings me McFlurries when I'm feeling sick. He kisses my forehead. He wants to adopt a fish together. He shares the blankets. He calls me beautiful. He says he loves me, and it's the first time anyone has told me that and I believe them. There's more, but, unfortunately, I would be writing all night if I had to continue.
So, Seaners, Happy Valentine's Day. I'm making this a link of my tumblr, so I know you'll check it, because you creep on it every other day. I honestly don't know what I would do without you. You're kind of my everything. I love you so much.
Yeeeeeeeeeee,
MK
Thursday, February 14, 2013
Sunday, February 3, 2013
Sorority Life
I hate girls, dressing up when it's -8 degrees outside, and constantly being judged. So what a better thing for me to go through than SPRING RECRUITMENT RUSH WEEKEND YAAAAAY!
Originally, I had never wanted to go into a sorority. The whole idea seemed dumb to me. You're just paying for friends and shitty vodka mixers, right? At least that's what I thought. Then, I started being excluded and ignored from my group of friends at school. Maybe it's because I don't like going out and getting shitfaced. Maybe it's because I (by some miracle of God) have a boyfriend. For whatever reason, I was being left out and felt lonelier and more depressed than I did at the beginning of the semester.
Then I met the Phi Sigs. THEY'RE. SO. COOL.They're all so different, but they get along. There's Harry Potter fans, lesbians, stoner girls, straightedge girls, fat girls, skinny girls, atheists, Christians, Jews, black, white, Asian, you name it. And they're all so welcoming. I knew from the first night of recruitment that I wanted to be with them.
My days were filled with "I'm Mary Kate. I'm an OT major from Cleveland" and trudging from sorority house to sorority house in heels. But it was SO worth it. By the end of the weekend, I bonded with the girls from Phi Sigma Sigma. I heard some of their stories: how they were lost when they first came to college, how their ex-boyfriends treated them like dirt, how they felt excluded and different from the rest of the school. And that's when it hit me: I belong here. It's not just about friends and t-shirts with Greek letters on them. You are bonded to your sisters because, essentially, they're all like little pieces of you. The more you love them, the more you love yourself. You heal each other. You help each other. And that's what I really want and need
When Phi Sig offered me a bid, I immediately accepted. My hands were shaking as I signed the sheet of paper. I went to Bid Night and felt at home and welcomed by my sisters. I'm just at New Member status for now, but I can already tell this is one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life. I can't wait until I get to wear my Phi Sigma Sigma letters with pride. It's only been a week since I've joined the sisterhood, and I already feel completely at home.
Until next time...
Originally, I had never wanted to go into a sorority. The whole idea seemed dumb to me. You're just paying for friends and shitty vodka mixers, right? At least that's what I thought. Then, I started being excluded and ignored from my group of friends at school. Maybe it's because I don't like going out and getting shitfaced. Maybe it's because I (by some miracle of God) have a boyfriend. For whatever reason, I was being left out and felt lonelier and more depressed than I did at the beginning of the semester.
Then I met the Phi Sigs. THEY'RE. SO. COOL.They're all so different, but they get along. There's Harry Potter fans, lesbians, stoner girls, straightedge girls, fat girls, skinny girls, atheists, Christians, Jews, black, white, Asian, you name it. And they're all so welcoming. I knew from the first night of recruitment that I wanted to be with them.
My days were filled with "I'm Mary Kate. I'm an OT major from Cleveland" and trudging from sorority house to sorority house in heels. But it was SO worth it. By the end of the weekend, I bonded with the girls from Phi Sigma Sigma. I heard some of their stories: how they were lost when they first came to college, how their ex-boyfriends treated them like dirt, how they felt excluded and different from the rest of the school. And that's when it hit me: I belong here. It's not just about friends and t-shirts with Greek letters on them. You are bonded to your sisters because, essentially, they're all like little pieces of you. The more you love them, the more you love yourself. You heal each other. You help each other. And that's what I really want and need
When Phi Sig offered me a bid, I immediately accepted. My hands were shaking as I signed the sheet of paper. I went to Bid Night and felt at home and welcomed by my sisters. I'm just at New Member status for now, but I can already tell this is one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life. I can't wait until I get to wear my Phi Sigma Sigma letters with pride. It's only been a week since I've joined the sisterhood, and I already feel completely at home.
Until next time...
Friday, January 11, 2013
Things That Are Freaking Me Out
In which I rant about stupid things so I can sleep better at night....
1. Classes. I'm not excited to go back to stress and general ickiness of school. I feel like I lost all my motivation for school during finals. At least I'm not the complete clueless freshmen and know the buildings that my classes are in this semester. Also, I have no idea when this dumb night lab is and no one else in my major knows. Alright.
2. Social stuff. I have The Sean. I have Other Mary. I have Bryan, and the APO people. I might even pledge a sorority. Why the fuck not? I even have Kaylin, when she's not gallivanting around with her man. The main problem is the girls on my floor. I like them, they're fun, they know where parties are, they have cars. They're just really catty. And gossipy. Like, they talk about each other behind their backs. And then I get paranoid that they're saying shit about me. I really want to have a group of girl friends, I just wish girls weren't so.......girly. This makes no sense when I'm writing it out and I don't actually understand why I'm worried about this.
3. Housing next year. Other Mary said I could live with her and one of her suitemates next year. But what if that fails? What if I have to live with one of the catty girls on my floor? Where the hell am I even going to live next year? I think Other Mary said it was an apartment. I can't afford an apartment! I have $200 in my bank account! How am I supposed to pay for food, and cleaning, and rent and furniture?!? Which brings me to my next problem...
4. Job. So, my junior and senior year of high school I worked at a fast food restaurant. The owner of the restaurant left for a new job right around the time I left for school. I was supposed to work there over break and meet the new owner, but oops, I got mono (I blame The Sean). Now, they've got a NEW new owner, I don't have a reference anymore, and I don't have any money in my bank account. Oh, and all the managers that liked me left too. SOOOO, I thought, maybe time to find a back up job? Looked up summer camp jobs and came down to 3 possibilities: 1) local camp job that I probably won't get even though my brother worked there and I have that whole "lineage" thing, 2) day camp job at the zoo that I am desperately hoping works out, or 3) Away camp job that I could easily obtain, but wouldn't be home all summer, wouldn't be able to see The Sean over summer, wouldn't be able to see friends. But I would be rich. Ugh decisions.
5. I just have this really bad feeling that second semester is going to be bad. Somebody's going to get deathly ill, The Sean will break up with me, Other Mary won't live with me, my physics professor won't speak English. SOMETHING. God, I need to stop worrying.
1. Classes. I'm not excited to go back to stress and general ickiness of school. I feel like I lost all my motivation for school during finals. At least I'm not the complete clueless freshmen and know the buildings that my classes are in this semester. Also, I have no idea when this dumb night lab is and no one else in my major knows. Alright.
2. Social stuff. I have The Sean. I have Other Mary. I have Bryan, and the APO people. I might even pledge a sorority. Why the fuck not? I even have Kaylin, when she's not gallivanting around with her man. The main problem is the girls on my floor. I like them, they're fun, they know where parties are, they have cars. They're just really catty. And gossipy. Like, they talk about each other behind their backs. And then I get paranoid that they're saying shit about me. I really want to have a group of girl friends, I just wish girls weren't so.......girly. This makes no sense when I'm writing it out and I don't actually understand why I'm worried about this.
3. Housing next year. Other Mary said I could live with her and one of her suitemates next year. But what if that fails? What if I have to live with one of the catty girls on my floor? Where the hell am I even going to live next year? I think Other Mary said it was an apartment. I can't afford an apartment! I have $200 in my bank account! How am I supposed to pay for food, and cleaning, and rent and furniture?!? Which brings me to my next problem...
4. Job. So, my junior and senior year of high school I worked at a fast food restaurant. The owner of the restaurant left for a new job right around the time I left for school. I was supposed to work there over break and meet the new owner, but oops, I got mono (I blame The Sean). Now, they've got a NEW new owner, I don't have a reference anymore, and I don't have any money in my bank account. Oh, and all the managers that liked me left too. SOOOO, I thought, maybe time to find a back up job? Looked up summer camp jobs and came down to 3 possibilities: 1) local camp job that I probably won't get even though my brother worked there and I have that whole "lineage" thing, 2) day camp job at the zoo that I am desperately hoping works out, or 3) Away camp job that I could easily obtain, but wouldn't be home all summer, wouldn't be able to see The Sean over summer, wouldn't be able to see friends. But I would be rich. Ugh decisions.
5. I just have this really bad feeling that second semester is going to be bad. Somebody's going to get deathly ill, The Sean will break up with me, Other Mary won't live with me, my physics professor won't speak English. SOMETHING. God, I need to stop worrying.
Thursday, January 10, 2013
I'm A Big Girl Now
A personal resolution I made for myself at the start of 2013 was to start writing again. Being in a science-dominated major, I don't really get to take many English or writing classes, which is something I cherished in high school. I just really like how writing about something is a productive distraction. You're distracting yourself from the outside world and it's problems, but at the same you're creating something that is all your own. I thought, "What better way to begin my 2013 goal than by creating a public blog where I write about my innermost thoughts and strangers can read about them!" And so it began.
A bit about myself: I'm a 19 year old college student beginning to hit that "Oh-shit-I'm-almost-20-is-this-real-life?" moment. I study Occupational Therapy at Gannon University, a college built right smack in the middle of Erie, PA. I met some pretty great people my first semester at Gannon, but I still feel like my friends from home understand me more. I really like cats. I really, really like weird hipster music. Unfortunately, I'm lacking in any interesting crisis as of lately, besides the whole "shit-shit-I-have-an-apartment-next-year-what" ordeal. Don't worry. There is bound to be some sort of thing I'm freaking out about in the near future.
A bit about myself: I'm a 19 year old college student beginning to hit that "Oh-shit-I'm-almost-20-is-this-real-life?" moment. I study Occupational Therapy at Gannon University, a college built right smack in the middle of Erie, PA. I met some pretty great people my first semester at Gannon, but I still feel like my friends from home understand me more. I really like cats. I really, really like weird hipster music. Unfortunately, I'm lacking in any interesting crisis as of lately, besides the whole "shit-shit-I-have-an-apartment-next-year-what" ordeal. Don't worry. There is bound to be some sort of thing I'm freaking out about in the near future.
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